A Major Question of Majors

(1) It was a common question. It echoed through the hallways and out into every corner of the university. Everyone was asking it. It was the new catch phrase. It was the new pick-up line, more commonly used than "What's your sign?" But I had no answer. I hated the question. I was "undeclared "like some unborn baby in its earliest stages. And, by the way I was going, I was merely awaiting abortion. Looking at the database of available majors, I could not make up my mind. Would I have to drop out of school because of my indecision? Would I be banned from a happy life if I couldn't figure this problem out?

(2)Tomorrow was the last day to declare a major. The last day! Everyone else was happily moving forward in their lives, choosing topics of study and predicting futures. I still hadn't made my big breakthrough in making this all too significant decision. "Don't worry, "my friends would say. "You can always major in business."

(3)Business? Not me. I was an artist. I would rather die than major in business. In fact, I didn't even need college. I could just go out into the world, and my great skills and abilities would be immediately recognized. On the night before my fate was to be declared, my parents were hosting a dinner party for two of their friends.

(4)Finally, rest! What would my parents' friends care about majors? I could eat dinner in peace and take a break from being posed this question for a couple of hours. I was wrong. All they could talk about was majors. They both had to share their majors with me, and both had an opinion as to what I should be. All their advice didn't put me any closer to a major, though. It just confused me even most.

(5)Neither of our dinner guests seemed particularly suited for his chosen job. For instance, Dr. Elkins, who claimed to be an expert at performing surgery, had trouble cutting his meat. And Mr. Albertson, the naval aircraft pilot, had difficulty targeting his mouth with his food. Every second spoonful was dropped to the ground. I couldn't imagine what his navigation skills were like in a fighter plane.

(6)Dinner was over, our guests left, the night was getting later, and I was still undeclared". t out the list of majors and began paging through the possibilities for the millionth time. Computers? There were already numerous computer majors. Chinese? I'd always wanted to go to China, but it seemed I could go there without majoring in it or even becoming fluent in the language. Mechanics? No. Advertising? No, again. This was hopeless.

(7)As college students often do, I decided that if just slept for a while and wakened up really early, I would be able to arrive at an answer to this enormously difficult question. I don't know exactly what it is in the college student's brain that thinks some special process occurs between 2 a. m. and 6 a. m. that will suddenly make everything clearer. It had worked for me in the past, but not this time.

(8) In fact, as college students are also likely to do, overslept. I woke up at 10 a. m. I had missed my first class, Survey of English Literature, and I had three hours to commit the rest of my life to something, anything. There was always business.

(9)As I rushed to school, I passed a movie theater playing Once is Not Enough, based on Jacqueline Susann's best-selling novel and starring David Janssen. Wait a minute! Movies. I love movies! I could major in movies. No, there is no major in movies. "But there is one in filmmaking," I thought. That's it! I was lost, but now I was found. was declared!

(10)Fifteen years later, I think of all my friends who so confidently began college with their majors declared. Of those who went around asking, "What's your major ?" very few are working in their chosen jobs. I didn't end up a filmmaker. And some days still feel "undeclared".

(11) It really doesn't matter what you major in, as long as you have a prosperous university experience. Involve yourself in those things that interest you and enjoy learning about the world. There is plenty of time to decide what you will do with the rest of your life.

Who is telling the story in this passage?